In Defense of Equal Civil Marriage Rights
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Is Marriage Under Attack?
The feeling that 'marriage' is under attack as part of the so-called homosexual agenda is based upon the perception by some that marriage has only one definition and that civil marriage and religious marriage are the exact same institution. The facts do not support this perception.
Many Meanings of "Marriage"
Marriage is not a monolithic, unchanging institution, even though many people define it that way (or believe that their God has defined it that way).
Civil marriage and religious marriage are different institutions, but are often confused with each other because States usually allow the religious ceremony to double as the State civil ceremony.
There are different marriage laws in all the States and different definitions of marriage in every religious tradition. These religious definitions are not the same unified definition that is often claimed. In addition to this diversity, civil marriage rights in the U.S. have been significantly broadened during the last fifty years.
The Basic Difference Between Civil and Religious Marriage
When clergy or congregations marry couples it is a religious rite, not a civil ceremony, although the government may recognize it. Clergy and congregations choose whom they marry. They aren't compelled to accept the state's marriage definition, and indeed, many religious institutions don't accept it. Some religious institutions are more restrictive than the state, rejecting interfaith marriages or remarriages after divorce. Other religious groups are less restrictive than the state, allowing same-gender ceremonies.
When a government official performs a civil marrage ceremony it is not a religious rite nor does it require any religious group to recognize it. Clergy and congregations remain free to choose individuals, couples and marriages they will accept.
The Diversity of Marriage's Definition
Unlike some religious definitions, civil definitions of marriage do not usually mention childbearing, sexual relations, living arrangements, or religious beliefs or observances.
In the religious definitions of marriage there are a variety of views. Many religious organizations and people of faith have definitions that are different. Some faiths consider marriage an aid to religious instruction. Some call it an expression of committed love. Some recognize only diferent-gender couples. Some recognize both same and diferent-gender couples. Some say it is mainly for raising children. In most Christian faiths marriage is a sacrament, in others it is not. But whether one agrees with someone else's religious definition of marriage (or baptism, or sacrament, or communion) one must respect everyone's Constitutional rights of free speech and free exercise of religion.
Entanglement and Discrimination
Civil marriage law has historically been used to legally encode the majority's faith held beliefs about marriage -- a direct violation of the Consititutional requirement for seperation of church and state. For example, in the past civil marriage was forbidden to members of certain ethnic groups; and forbidden between people who were not members of the same ethnic group (regardless of any religious recognition of such a marriage). Blacks and whites still could not marry each other in some states until the Supreme Court overturned those laws in 1967.
State governments generally let religious ceremonies double as state ceremonies (in some states it is illegal to call a religious blessing a marriage without benefit of a marriage license from the state).
Currently, same-gender relationships are blessed in houses of worship by clergy and congregations from a wide range of religious traditions. Such religious same-gender marriages are not representative of the religious majority. Seemingly, because of this fact, the federal government and many State governments refuse to grant the legal civil marriage recognition to such same-gender couples that is granted to mixed-gender couples blessed in marriage ceremonies by the same religious organizations. Such failure to offer equal civil rights is also a Constitutionally questionable practice.
Six states (Massachusetts, Connecticut, Iowa, Vermont, Main and New Hampsire) offer civil marriage benefits to same sex couples. New Jersey offers state level civil union recognition. Same-sex couples living in California, the District of Columbia, Nevada, Maryland, Oregon and Washington can take advantage of broad domestic partner laws that offer access to the state-level rights and responsibilities of marriage. In addition, Hawaii allows same-sex couples to receive a limited set of rights through reciprocal beneficiary relationships, which function as a sort of limited domestic partner relationshipmarriage/union status. California recognizes as legal those civil marriages of same-gender couples that took place prior to passage of Prop. 8. New York and the District of Columbia consider as legal same sex marriages performed legally elsewhere. But, in all cases, there is no federal recognition of these state approved arrangments.
Religious Support for Equal Rights
Many religious organizations, including even those that do not recognize religious same-gender marriage, either directly support civil marriage for same-gender couples, support equal civil rights for same-gender couples, or are opposed to the denial of equal civil rights for same-gender couples.
The reasons religious organizations support equal civil rights for same-gender couples are varied. But it is fair to say that most see it as a matter of love, justice, basic fairness, and civil rights. Many agree that legal recognition of same-gender marriage would make very positive moral and social points--that we as a people value committed, caring relationships and do not discriminate on the basis of gender, sexual orientation or religion.
What's The Fight About?
Within the last few years "Defense of Marriage" acts have been passed by Congress and many states' legislatures. Because these acts are Constitutionally quetionable, a Constitutional ammendment has being proposed to 'protect' the different-gender nature of civil marriage. BUT, no religion's definition or conduct of a marriage is under attack. Civil marriage isn't jeopardized by opening it up to more people: there aren't a limited number of licenses. People who support civil marriage for same-gender couples are not asking the state to stop recognizing mixed-gender marriages. Recognition of same-gender civil marriages has no possible way of reducing the legal rights of mixed-gender married couples. Nor does such legal recognition have any proven potential for reducing the value, beliefs or sanctity of any mixed-gender couple's family unit.
Although States have different requirements for civil marriage (such as residency and waiting periods, age of consent, kinship restrictions, and blood tests), and different procedures for obtaining a license, all States and the federal government automatically recognize all marriages and divorces from all States. Except -- religious marriages of same-gender couples which are not given automatic civil marriage status as with similar different-gender couples, Vermont's same-gender 'civil union' because that's not a 'marriage' and Massachusettes' same-gender civil marriage unions because of existing (but Constitutionally questionable) Defense of Marriage legislation.
A committed same-gender couple should have the right to be joined in a civil marriage that is legally the same as any other civil marriage. This right would not require any religious body to approve the act or conduct any ceremony.
Why Isn't Civil Union Sufficient?
Without civil marriage, families are not legally recognized by State or national governments as families. In situations involving child custody, medical decisions, burial, and inheritance, preference is given to legally-recognized family members. There are thousands of local, State, and federal laws in which legal civil marital status determines government treatment of two consenting adults in a relationship. Without civil marriage recognition it is difficult or impossible to legally establish and maintain families (especially when facing opposition from relatives), contrary to the Constitutional right of free association. The specifics are:
(A Defense of Marriage Act: An Update to Prior Report; General Accounting Office, Washington, D.C. 2004)
- Only a civil marriage is portable - recognized in all 50 states, the District of Columbia, U.S. territories, and foreign nations. A civil union is not. When a partner fall ill or dies away from the couple's home state, only a civil marriage will be recognized to guarantee such rights as hospital visitation or the ability to sign a partner's death certificate.
- Only a civil marriage has full federal recognition in 1138A separate laws within the U.S. Code. For example, a surviving spouse is entitled to full Social Security survivor benefits, as are surviving children. Wartime death compensation . . the right to take federal famly leave . . student loan eligibility . . are not available benefits to anyone in a civil union or their children.
- Only civil marriage provides a national framework for all joint financial assets: the fairness guarantees of divorce law . . inheritance rights . . estate resolution in the absence of a will . . asset protection for estranged couples with joint accounts and real estate.
- Civil marriage has enormous workplace implications: to qualify for health insurance and other benefits, to preserve that insurance during unemployment, and pension entitlements. Some progressive firms and governmental bodies do recognize same sex (domestic) partners for these benefits, most do not.
- As noted, civil marriage is the only way to protect the well-being of our children and the dignity of our departed. Ask those opposed to imagine being shut out of their partner's sick room, losing custody rights to their children, being denied the right to plan a funeral that honors the one they love. Then ask if they would accept a Civil Union.
GET INVOLVED
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Information on this page is based on the Religious Support for Equal Marriage Rights web page which also contains an extensive links section AND upon the Human Rights Campaign's detailed reasons for supporting Civil Marriage vs Civil Union.
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